Carlos Turdtana

While George Harrison had a guitar that gently weeps, Carlos Santana’s guitar is so dry that it drips sand.

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The turd of the U.S. Government

Without question…

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Man loses boxing match to 12 pack of beer

In honor of idiocy, we give you this gem!

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Morrissey is not gay!

With legions of female fans, sensitive male fans who can recite all the lyrics to every Smiths’ song, perfectly styled hair (the likes of which we haven’t seen since Roger Moore’s cheesey James Bond days), and properly ironed and pressed clothing, Morrissey is a shinning beacon of heterosexuality.
Andrew Winters, a lifelong Morrissey fan and Morrissey’s [...]

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Bill O’Turdly under fire

It seems that there has been a lot of activity on the web defaming one Mr. Bill O’Turdly and his oh-so-scientific methods and his report on current ground breaking research in male baldness.
 

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Britney Spears, the new Anna Nicole

As we all know Britney Spears was hospitalized late last week, after the pop star locked herself in a room with one of her children at her L.A. home and refused to hand him over to her ex-husband Kevin Federline.
But, what the public doesn’t know is what the former pop queen told police officers when [...]

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The 2008 Nick Nolte look alike contest winner

TUSCON, Arizona - Giving new meaning to an ex-girlfriend with an axe to grind, Kumari Fullbright, who won the 2008 first annual Nick Nolte look alike contest, has been accused of holding and torturing her 24-year-old ex-boyfriend in early December with the help of three other men, including another man she had previously dated.
The law [...]

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Somebody please frame this Nazi Asshole!

Bill O'Turdly, July 2, 2008

We here at Turd on a Stick still have not achieved our goal of getting this Nazi off the air.

If you are able to do this Turd on a Stick is offering you and a companion free airfare to Bangkok, Thailand.

Interested?

All you have to do is frame Bill O’Reilly in a cheap hotel room with at least an eight ball of cocaine, two prostitutes and some animals of your choice, preferably goats, preforming lewd and obscene sexual acts.

The winner will receive free airfare for two to Bangkok, Thailand, a life time supply of Tramadol (the official pharmaceutical drug of Turd on a Stick), and at least two whores of your choice in a cheap Bangkok hotel room for one glorious evening.

* To win, you must supply Turd on a Stick with videotaped evidence and personal eye witness accounts from the prostitutes involved along with the police report detailing Mr O’Reilly’s offenses.

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eCoffin.com, The online coffin and cemetary plot retailer

Bill O'Turdly, July 1, 2008

Hello, and thanks for your interest in eCoffin.com. As you may now we are the first online coffin and cemetery plot retailer. Founded in June of 2000, eCoffin.com provides people with necessary accommodations for the after life. From hand-crafted bronze caskets to oak caskets, eCoffin.com offers a wide range of caskets for you or your loved ones. Just point and click on the coffin of your choice and add it to the shopping cart. It is that easy!!!

Further, to ensure the proper resting place, ecoffin.com enables you to choose from a vast array of cemetery plots. Choose from swamp land in Alabama to the shifting sands of the Hamptons. eCoffin.com has it all. Just point and click. It is that simple!!

Remember our slogan: eCoffin.com, You’re virtually dead!

Yours Truly,

Henry C. Butlowski

President and C.E.O of eCoffin.com

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Huckabee spotted on hotchickswithdouchebags.com

Bill O'Turdly, February 12, 2008

LOS ANGELES — Mike Huckabee has a secret life that he is not telling his followers. The Christian fascist was spotted at a trendy LA night club shirtless, with a tie and two “Christian soldiers” on his arms.

As reported on hotchickswithdouchebags.com:

Shirtlessness.

It’s what’s for douchebags.

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