Zbigniew Brzezinski’s 2008 U.S. Presidential Puppet Set

Bill O'Turdly, September 2, 2008 # 3 Comments

It does not matter who wins the 2008 U.S. Presidential election because our favorite fascist pal Zbigniew Brzezinski has already won. Whether, Obama, who Brzezinksi serves as his chief foreign policy adviser, or McCain, who Randy Scheunemann, the successor to Henry Kissinger and Brzezinski, serves as McCain’s foreign policy coordinator, wins is completely irrelevant because [...]

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McCain Palin to sponsor a Nascar?

Bill O'Turdly, August 31, 2008 # 2 Comments

We here at TOAS have gotten an exclusive look at a Nascar that the McCain Palin campaign is planning to sponsor. In honor of Sarah Palin’s not so subtle coming out on the side of Creationism, we give you this.

How quickly do most Americans forget the words of Thomas Jefferson.
The priests of the different religious [...]

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Michelle Malkin the new Imelda Marcos

Bill O'Turdly, August 26, 2008 # One Comment

Nothing says shitbomb better than Michelle Malkin. The conservative whore de jour after all only argues for aggressive racial profiling and internment of all citizens. How quickly does one forget her origins coming from a family who fled from the tyrant Ferdinand Marcos in 1970. I guess like all women she is attracted to shoes. [...]

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McCain can’t keep his dick out of the mud

Bill O'Turdly, August 19, 2008 # No Comment Yet

Our crazy fascist pal John can’t keep his dick out of the mud. First, it was his unfounded comments about the Georgia/Russia conflict. Now, he has been busted receiving illegal campaign donations from the Rothschilds. We do not know about you, but if you believe the “nonexistent” New World Order then these elite Londoners seem [...]

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Turd of the Week: John McCain

Bill O'Turdly, August 16, 2008 # No Comment Yet

Speaking to reporters about the situation in Georgia, Sen. John McCain denounced the aggressive posture of Russia by claiming that:”in the 21st century nations don’t invade other nations.”
I guess our pal John either has selective memory and has forgot about Iraq and Afghanistan or he feels that the United States is above international law and [...]

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U.S. sought to fly a false flag

Bill O'Turdly, August 2, 2008 # No Comment Yet

Seymour Hersh of the New Yorker magazine, leaked this bombshell, pun intended, at the Progress Journalism Conference. The question is why did Hersh decide to wait to speak out on this?

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TOAS Haunted House: former U.S. Vice President Henry Wallace rises from the dead

Bill O'Turdly, September 18, 2007 # No Comment Yet

At the height of the war against the Axis powers, former U.S. Vice President Henry Wallace was extremely prophetic in the New York Times on April 9, 1944:

The really dangerous American fascists are not those who are hooked up directly or indirectly with the Axis. The FBI has its finger on those. The dangerous [...]

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Karl Rove is now running spin for bin-Laden

Bill O'Turdly, September 9, 2007 # No Comment Yet

WASHINGTON D.C. — Sources close to Karl Rove have informed TOAS that Karl Rove has accepted a position within Al-Queda. The former adviser to U.S. President Bush is reportedly now working on global strategy and public relations in order to help improve the Islamic Extremists’ image across the globe.
According to an unidentified source, Mr. Rove’s [...]

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Give your money to a scoundrel and help Christian fascist America move forward

Bill O'Turdly, August 1, 2007 # No Comment Yet

Our good Christian buddy Tom DeLay needs your help. It seeems that those damn secular liberal pansies have railroaded one of our great leaders.
You might remember Tom’s great words from April 12, 2002 at the “World Weekend” conference at the First Baptist Church in Peerland, Teaxas:
Ladies and gentlemen, Christianity offers the only viable, reasonable, definitive [...]

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Bush To Pardon Dick Cheney’s Bitch

Bill O'Turdly, July 5, 2007 # No Comment Yet

WASHINGTON D.C . - After communting Lewis “Scooter” Libby’s jail sentence, US President George W. Bush has not ruled out the possiblity of pardoning US Vice President Dick Cheney’s bitch.
Before being pardoned, Libby must pay a $250,ooo fine and serve two years probation. In a statement, Bush reiterated that Libby’s punishment was “severe” and [...]

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The Greatest Lie Ever Told: “God Loves Everyone.”

Bill O'Turdly, June 25, 2007 # One Comment

Yeah, well no shit! God only loves white people who are fascists. Furthermore, if you are gay, Arabic, not a ne0-conservative or just simply not inept, then he hates you too.
I always thought that religion was a private enterprise. So, if you are dumb, stupid or simply a homophobic racist, The Westboro Baptist Church is [...]

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Turd O’Reilly Calls A Person or Group a Derogatory Name Every 6.8 Seconds: TOAS Presents a Challenge to You, Our Reader

Bill O'Turdly, May 8, 2007 # No Comment Yet

BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Bill O’Reilly may proclaim at the beginning of his program that viewers are entering the “No Spin Zone,” but a new study by Indiana University media researchers found that the Fox News personality consistently paints certain people and groups as villains and others as victims to present the world, as he sees [...]

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