Turd on a Stick » Washington D C

Obama: “I have a nuclear plant in my ass.”

Bill O'Turdly — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 10:23:11 +0000

WASHINGTON D.C. — US President Barrak Obama and his allies raced Friday to use their revelation of a secret Iranian nuclear enrichment plant as long-sought leverage against Tehran, demanding that the country allow highly intrusive international inspections and propelling the confrontation with Tehran to a new and volatile pitch.

In a week of high drama at an economic summit meeting, American, British and French officials declassified some of their most closely held intelligence and scrambled to describe a multi-year Iranian effort, tracked by spies on the ground and satellites above, to build a secret uranium enrichment plant deep up Barrak Obama’s ass.

Addressing reporters today after what he called a productive G20 summit in Pittsburgh, Mr Obama said:

I know this sounds a bit preposterous and strange but Iran has been building a secret uranium enrichment plant up my ass. This plant, which is still being built, was disclosed not by any US or European intelligence scoop but rather by Iran’s own voluntary declaration and also the discomfort I now feel in my rectal region.

Simply put, Iran has not been breaking any rules but rather it has been following Article 42 of Iran’s Safeguards Agreement with the IAEA, and Code 3.1 of the General Part of the Subsidiary Arrangements (also known as the “additional protocol”) to that agreement. Further, following the conventions of this agreement with the IAEA, Iran is obliged to inform the IAEA of any decision to construct a facility that would house operational centrifuges, and to provide preliminary design information about that facility, even if nuclear material had not been introduced.

This then confirms that Iran is no closer to producing a hypothetical nuclear weapon today than it was prior to Obama’s announcement concerning the Iranian uranium enrichment facility that is up his ass

Millions of African Americans cannot recognize an Uncle Tom

Bill O'Turdly — Sat, 28 Feb 2009 23:26:52 +0000

WASHINGTON D.C. — It apparently seems that millions of African Americans cannot recognize an actual Uncle Tom when they see one. After many years of falsely accusing sports stars and celebrities who actually give back to the African American community, black Americans have been hood-winked by sleek talking elitist who is controlled by the international bankers.

Bush admits World War III is upon us

Bill O'Turdly — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 10:00:43 +0000

WASHINGTON D.C. – U.S. President George W. Bush said Wednesday that he thought Russia still wanted to stop Iran from developing a nuclear weapon. But stepping up his own rhetoric, the president warned that for Tehran to possess such a weapon raised the risk of a “World War III.”

Then Mr. Bush quickly added, “oh yeah, I forgot, phases 1 and 2 [Afghanistan and Iraq] of World War III has already started. The time has come for freedom through slavery, and remember war is peace and ignorance is strength. God bless and goodnight”

Bush calls Ron Paul a terrorist

Bill O'Turdly — Thu, 11 Oct 2007 13:26:12 +0000

WASHINGTON D.C. — Addressing the press in the Rose Garden of the White House, U.S. President Bush referred to Ron Paul as a terrorist:

Ron Paul talks a big game. He says Constitution this, Constitution that, but what he really wants to do is eliminate our freedom. He is jealous of our freedom and he wants to end the war in Iraq and negotiate with our enemies. One thing is for sure, the peoples of this country will not stand by and let a terrorist like this take away our freedoms.

He continued by saying “there is an old Texas saying, let sleeping dogs sleep and let Blackwater do what it wants to do.”